I realized that I've been doing so much bitching and ranting about my suck ass job that I should change my blog to A Day In The Life of The Angry and Disgruntled Worker.

So, in keeping with my general feelings on this sort of thing, I am no longer devoting a lot of energy to being mad. It is what it is, correct? You can't make people know what their talking about - they just gotta be dumb on their own! But I did pack up my office and am ready to roll on a moments notice...soooo...

Its hard to be positive when almost everyone around you is a jackass.

I do have many wonderful things going on however. My kids are on Spring Break. My hubby just returned from LA. I spent some time with friends I never get to see. I took a nice couple of days to do "me" time.

Because it is a rare occasion indeed, to be alone at home. Hubby out of town. Children gone. I felt so damn free. I felt so happy. I came and went as I pleased. I didn't cook if I didn't want to. If I wanted to watch a movie, I did. If I wanted to sleep on the couch, I could. It was just fantastic. And then I capped it off with the longest hot steam shower in history. No one asking me whats for dinner. No one saying they needed clean clothes. For a brief moment in time, it was just me again. And I loved it.

And then Wednesday, it was over. Hubby and kids back.

But I revel in the three days that I had. I think its why I didn't quit my job last week. So lets view that as a positive as well.

Now lets chat about something that is really up my alley. The NCAA tourney. Man, how many of you picked Old Dominion University in the first round? Ha! I did! And then...it all went down hill. I always said that when I made my bracket picks, half of them were based on sentimental value and the other half on knowing the game of basketball. For instance, that ODU pick was just knowing there was going to be an upset in the first round. Picking Pitt? Purely because my cousin played for Pitt. Having a Big East final four? Just stupid. Thanks a lot Georgetown and Villanova! But then, at the end of last week - I found out that i was in 4th place. Really? And then-Syracuse went and screwed me this weekend. I'm not totally dead yet, though. I still got one of my two championship teams in there: West Virginia. So lets go Mountaineers!

A shame when basketball is whats really making me happy nowadays!

The roller coaster ride contines. My dear friend, the UNC alum, is leaving at the end of this month and if I wasn't happy for him beginning a new life with his fiance-I'd totally be throwing myself at his feet begging him not to leave. But the reason is completely okay with me since I've never been the type to begrudge anyone's happiness.

My middle child turned 13 last Saturday. So it's offical, with two teenagers and a tween, I am officially stir-crazy!

And then last night, I had another rare occasion to do whatever I wanted to. Hubby is in LA for work and the kid went to Camp Schmidt with her 5th Grade class. I took a looong hot shower, relaxed and went to sleep in the middle of the bed. Perfection! And my theory on this little phenomenon is that single people want to be married with children (most of them do, one day) and married people, while they may not want to BE single - they want to REMEMBER what it was like when they were single! So small moments like last night - they are really peace of mind moments. We should all be so lucky to have them!

But the party is over today. The kid is back from Camp and the hubby is returning on a red-eye on Wednesday. I enjoyed my one day of peace and am back to regular old life as usual.

A life that includes Anita Baker tickets in August. Now that's a good damn life.

If I'm still employed at the beginning of the month, I haven't committed a felony at work and all is good. This is where we are right now. So sad, I know.

So my get together a few weeks ago was quaint (meaning hardly no one showed up) but very nice. And it was appreciated by my friend that came in from out of town. So that was the most important thing, really.

I'm still fed up with the bullshit at work. There's just no more to say about that.

This past weekend I had the very rare occurance to have the children out of the house and the husband out of town. Let me just give you the best description I possibly can: SILENCE. I went to bed with no tv blasting sportscenter. That hasn't happened in 8 years!

And it's highly ironic since I love to talk and love to chat with friends. But lately, it seems that the silence is what I love the most. I find myself getting in the car and not turning on the radio or listening to anything. I just want quiet. I'm pretty sure I will be headed for a white padded room in my old age, but whatever. Quiet is what makes me happy right now.

My sister who got married last year is pregnant. I got to say, I don't love the new husband as much as I did the old husband. My former brother in law (and father to my nieces and nephew) is the coolest. And I know why they divorced and I understand. But the new hubby? I woun't have picked him for her at all. He's younger than her and he doesn't have any kids of his own until the baby is due in September. He didn't start on the greatest foot with my nieces and nephew either. And for me, once you do the babies wrong - I might not end up feeling you at all. That's just me. Maybe when his is born, he'll shape up. But I don't know...

While I still have a good life, sometimes I wish that the path I have carved out for myself was a little less rocky. Yeah, yeah, I know that trials and tribulations give you character and get you ready for even harder obstacles - I GET IT! And I'm not hardly in as bad a situation as some folks, losing homes and jobs and stuff. Do I need a paved yellow brick road? Nah, that's not it. I just wish that sometimes I didn't have to work so hard for so little. Is that asking too much?

My God! I wish I could love a job for more than 5 years. This place has become toxic to say the least.

Partly my fault, though. I wish someone would have told me my junior year of college to just go ahead and finish the student teaching! If someone would have just said, "Knock it out and save yourself a lifetime of being demeaned and put down as an assistant". Perhaps I would of listened and just done it. Then again, my coworker DOES have a degree from UNC and he's being treated like shit too. Hmmm...people hung up on titles are dicks. That's for sure.

So, I tell my Tarheel friend that I swear if I win the lottery I'd be out of here. I'd open my gift basket store (cuz that's MY dream) and say fuck you to all these kiss asses. I am so sick of office politics. Its the reason I've left the last two companies. I'd say I was a ticking time bomb in here-one more off the cuff remark and I'm bout to really go postal in this camp. I'll get to cussing folks out and then take off for lunch and not come back. Trust me its been done before.

Enough about the foolishness at the place of employment. Let's talk about the more positive since I haven't touched on that in a while. Let's see-what is positive in my life right now?

Still breathing.

*crickets*

Still happily married.

*more crickets*

Kids are doing well.

I guess that about sums it up. I've got a family that loves me. That's enough for me.